the maybe daily draw

Pencil on Paper

A Scary Diagram of Risk

Pencil on Paper

Days I like work, are days when I get to make stuff like this:

Adobe® Illustrator

Oh, and eff you Charlie Sheen for creating a mile long list of quotables in one interview.

Update coming soon

Pencil on Paper

Another one of those days.

BUT THIS TIME.  A message of good morale.

I WILL.

Adobe Photoshop®

This is what happens when my morale is low at work…

..I make pretty things involving the company so I trick myself into having a brighter outlook on the day.

+20 glitter points…

Adobe Photoshop®

Pen on Paper

Yeaaah…very tardy Day 13

Within good reason…swamped at work, so very much that I take work home to do on top of my freelance work.  Yep.

But I get paid to do stuff like this:

I’m the one falling down the mountain.

1st Draft: Pencil on Paper

2nd Draft: Adobe® Photoshop

Final Draft: Adobe® Illustrator

A little commentary is going with this post.

WHY I DON’T LIKE DRAWING PORTRAITS/CHARICATURES

This is what you’d probably look like:

Even if it’s accurate to the “T” you will find something horribly hideous about it.

“Does my nose really look like that?”  “I think you misaligned my eyes.”  “Can you not draw in my double chin?”  “Can you make me look skinnier?”

SO, after a few changes under YOUR art direction..we’ll get this:

A SUPER self-envisioned idealized you.

Your lips are plumper, your chin is thinner, your hair has more volume, etc, etc.  You may be happy with it…but it looks NOTHING like you.  And I would have FAILED at drawing a portrait or whatever of you.

So when you leave, I am inclined to draw this:

In your mind, it’s probably about “making the customer happy,” but that defeats the purpose of a portrait, which is an accurate depiction of you as you are at that time; or charicatures, which are accurate depictions of you with exaggerated features. 

If you ever get one drawn, don’t be offended or butt-hurt by the outcome…you’re not ugly (unless you are or the artist REALLY sucks).  This is not the opportune time to mold your face to what you want to look like…you’re just going to get a picture of no one and waste someone else’s time.

STORY TIME:

(flashback to High School)

Not to toot my own horn, I used to be REALLY GOOD.  I sold paintings to teachers and their families, and some would PAY ME to keep my class projects…all true. 

Some classmate wanted me to draw a photo realistic portrait of her and boyfriend for a payment, so I did it.  She got it 1.5 weeks later, first thing she says is “Ugh!  My eyes aren’t that chinky!”

The truth: Yes they were.  I could never see the whites of her eyes..ever.

“Is my face really that round?”

The truth: Yeah, it probably was, but your BF has a long angular face..so having your face so close to his, probably makes your head seem rounder than it should.

“OMG, my nose.”

The truth: You’re Asian, you have a flat nose, deal with it.

She refused to pay me but kept the portrait (I know, what a skank).  We argued, she cried a bit then walked off. Whatever, no monies, waste of time, over with it, moved on.

Her BF played on the boys’ basketball team and found me during girls’ basketball practice, he paid me and thanked me for making his something-month anniversary present.  He also apologized, I quoteth him: “she’s probably on her rag.” (My mind: WTF)

TRUE STORY.

Dropped some knowledge on you all.

Pen on Post-it

This is going to have to count.